New years resolution - Love, Live, Thrive
To give you an accurate picture of why I've chosen this specific goal, I need to give you some insight into the year just passed.
2014 presented me with many challenges that left me mentally, emotionally and physically broken - but I survived. My entire year last year was about surviving, not thriving. My dog of 10 years passed away at the start of the year, followed by my husband and I separating after our 13 year relationship. I moved out of my home; have felt financial pressure totally new to me; lost people I have always considered my family and had to let go of everything that has meant something to me for my entire adult life. The most difficult thing for me has been stress and concern for my children - whom I want to have a happy and fulfilling lives. I posted this on facebook last year at one of the most difficult times...
The trials and tribulations did consume me but they did not break me. I found friendships strengthening and became someone not afraid to ask for help. It changed me, absolutely for the better. I knew going into a new year that if I were going to thrive instead of simply survive, I needed to adjust my mindset.
I decided that with the new year I was going to spend more time cherishing and valuing what I have, rather than worrying and fretting about the things in my life that are difficult, stressful and upsetting. To me this would be the difference between me thriving and surviving.
This is where the story comes in. The story I read spoke of a tablespoon of salt in a glass of water verses a tablespoon of salt in a freshwater lake. Pain, suffering, grief, stress can be represented by the salt. In a glass of water it makes the water taste bitter and is no longer refreshing.
If my life is like the volume of water in the glass, the salt taints all the wonderful that exists in the water. In comparison, when the bitter salt is added to a freshwater lake the salt disperses and cannot be tasted when you drink the water. If I see my life as a lake and realise the enormity of the wonderful in my life, the bitter moments won't matter to the extent they once did. This is the theory, but how do I put it into practice?
I have many things in my life that make it incredible, yet I have always been very good at seeing what's annoying (I'm sure lots of mums can relate). I have always admired mums that see the value in being a mum because in all honesty I have always felt like there was very little wonderful. Being a single mum and dealing with my own personal challenges made it almost impossible for me to see the things I love most. Instead, these were the things I saw...
'I'm tired' - 'I need a break' - 'I just want to pee without someone touching me' - 'I really wish they'd stop saying muuuum 50 thousand times a day' - 'I'm tired of cooking and my girls not touching a single thing' - 'why won't they listen?' - 'I really wish I didn't have to worry about money'
I regularly had these thoughts. Since I became more aware of how I see my world, each time I feel stressed or worried about something, I remind myself of three things that make me happy, make me laugh or make me proud. This dilutes these minor (yet very legitimate) complaints and I can see my wonderful. I make sure to be proud of what I do and achieve, not just what my girls achieve. No matter how insignificant my battles seem, I'm still a champion.
So consumed with what we don't do, we often beat ourselves up when we actually have every reason to celebrate what we DO. I know I'm not alone in this so I encourage all of you to join me! Lets make this the year of love, live thrive and expand our lives to the size of a lake <3
Thank you for reading and please feel free to share your own stories!